This year, I find myself overwhelmed with gratitude. There are so many things I’m thankful for—blessings that seemed unending, many of which I never even expected. Looking back, it’s hard to believe how much has happened. I remember how 2024 began for me, with a whirlwind of emotions: hope that things would fall into place, frustration when they didn’t, heartbreak that I didn’t see coming, and so many dreams that felt both exciting and daunting. Now, as this year draws to a close, I’m filled with a deep sense of gratefulness—thankful to God for His unwavering love and endless grace.

As the year closes, I’m working on letting go. It’s not easy. There are things—old wounds, unresolved emotions, and even grudges—that I’m still holding onto. Some of them are petty, and though I wish I could simply leave them behind, I know it’s a process. I’m only human, after all. Letting go of the hurt caused by people who’ve wronged me or the irritation from those who test my patience isn’t something that happens overnight. But I’m learning to rise above it, to let these things pass through me without consuming me.

When I think about 2025, I feel hopeful. I want to step into the new year with a bigger heart, a stronger spirit, and a more forgiving mindset. I want to embrace growth, even when it’s uncomfortable, and aim to be the best version of myself—not for anyone else but for me. I know it won’t be perfect, but that’s okay. It’s not about perfection; it’s about progress.

Here’s to a new year of becoming, of healing, and of showing up for myself in ways I never have before. Prayers for my family, friends, and for all the people I hold dear in my heart. May this new year bring peace, love, and endless blessings to everyone I cherish. 

Labels: HAPPY NEW YEAR, Journal, journey

Some people feel the need to give unsolicited opinions, even when what they’re saying could be hurtful. Sure, it might be true, but for goodness’ sake, if you don’t have something kind to say, just don’t say anything at all. It might seem funny to you, but take a moment—think three times—about whether it’ll be funny to the person on the receiving end.

Making fun of someone’s appearance is beyond rude and insensitive. I can’t imagine ever doing that to someone. How can you shatter someone’s confidence just because you haven’t experienced their journey? It’s cruel, plain and simple.

Addy is honestly one of the worst people I know. He’s done this so many times—always has something to say about my appearance. And the thing is, I’d never do that to anyone, not even to him, because it’s just not kind. At the very least, have the decency to act like a decent human being. Oh well, I guess that’s just how he was raised.

And LOL, I still can’t figure out what his deal is. Why call out my skin texture? Yeah, it’s not perfect, and it’s never going to be perfect, but why even bring it up? He didn’t just mention it—he had to emphasize how “damaged” it is. Like, really? Hahaha. He even said something like, “You have damaged skin even though you use tons of skincare.” I was just sitting there, thinking, WTF is wrong with you, dude? That moment wanna punch his mouth ..

To be honest, I was so pissed at that moment. I could literally feel the heat rising from the back of my neck all the way to my head. I was sitting there wishing the ground would just swallow me whole, questioning my existence, like, Is this really happening right now?

I honestly have no words for this kind of person. There was a time when I’d feel so guilty even thinking something negative about him, but not anymore. No more regrets now.

Labels: maldives, office, work

 Hey Journal,

Today marks my 35th birthday, and it feels like just yesterday I was in my twenties. Now here I am, stepping into 35 years of life. It’s both surreal and bittersweet to realize how quickly time flies.

What really hits me is the thought of my mom aging alongside me. She’s now double my age—she had me in her 30s—and it terrifies me to think that everyone I hold dear is growing older, too. Time seems so relentless sometimes.

These past few weeks, I’ve been so worried about my Ninang Nelia. It breaks my heart to think about everything she’s going through because of her illness—the burden it places on her physically, mentally, spiritually, and financially.

My cousin, John Paul, has been nothing short of amazing. His dedication, love, and commitment to his parents are truly inspiring. He’s been their rock through all of this, and I admire him so much for his strength.

Labels: birthday, life, prayers, reflection

Hey Journal,

I have so many memories, stories, and experiences from these past four years. I’m truly grateful for everything—the ups and downs, and for facing my fears and struggles when I first moved here. It feels like just yesterday when it all began, and in the blink of an eye, four years have flown by.

I feel at home now—Maldives has truly become my home, even though a part of me still longs for Singapore. What’s strange is that I don’t feel the same way about the Philippines, my birthplace. I spent so many years there, but it doesn’t give me the sense of comfort or belonging that I’ve found here.

Whenever I visit the Philippines, I miss my family deeply—my mom, my siblings, my nephews, and nieces. I treasure every moment with them, but I can’t shake the feeling of being a stranger. The streets, the familiar places, and even the memories feel distant, as if I’ve outgrown that part of my life. It’s a bittersweet feeling, knowing I’ll always love my family and the good memories from home, but realizing that my heart has found its home somewhere else.  

The past four years have been filled with dreams and plans—so many of them—but life didn’t always turn out the way I hoped. At first, it was hard to accept, but along the way, life taught me something invaluable, to go with the flow. That simple mindset became the answer to so many of my worries, sleepless nights, and moments when I felt trapped by overthinking.

Looking back, I realize how much I’ve overcome, and that’s something I’m proud of. Through it all, God was there, protecting me in ways I didn’t see at the time. It wasn’t always obvious, but He reminded me to stay grounded, to keep my faith strong, and to trust in His plan. Those moments of struggle turned into lessons that strengthened me, and I’m grateful for the protection and guidance that brought me to where I am now.

Labels: expat, experience, maldives

I'll never regret supporting and holding high standards for Atty. Leni Robredo. She was the best Vice President the Philippines has ever had. To be honest, I was never previously involved in political discourse; I didn't think it mattered. But during that period, I felt a passion to become informed about these issues.

I was right. After Rodrigo Duterte took office, it felt like the Philippines began a downward spiral that hasn't slowed. It's disheartening to see fake news, trolls, and continued support for the Duterte clan. Issues like POGO, the ABS-CBN shutdown, the “fake” drug war, the West Philippine Sea dispute, and more—there are no words. It’s exhausting to keep fighting for a country where so many are misled by the temporary financial gain politicians offer, the rich keep getting richer, while the poor grow even poorer, and it’s incredibly unfair. People’s taxes are being looted, with only a few benefiting from money that isn’t even rightfully theirs. And those inept senators make my blood boil.

Political dynasties have turned public service into a family business for many politicians. Are they good at their jobs? I’d bet not. It’s the same faces, the same names, yet nothing ever changes in the Philippines. Honestly, it’s both frustrating and sad to witness.

Curse them,

To those who have disrespected Atty. Leni in any way—shame on you. I made one simple post on my Facebook, and Leisan had the nerve to comment, taking cheap shots at Atty. Leni. That was a low blow, and honestly, with what Leisan has been going through lately, maybe it's just what he deserves. Any empathy I had left is now gone. Good luck 

Labels: Leni, Philippines, political

 I feel like a terrible person. It's like I'm adding fuel to a fire that's already burning, only making things worse.

I feel like I'm not a good casual friend to the people around me. I admit, I've been a bit of a snitch, making fun of a certain friend and sharing his words with others. I know it's a bad habit and not the right way to treat anyone. It's definitely a toxic trait, and I realize it's something I need to work on. Sometimes I do it without even thinking, just to have something to talk about, but I know that's not an excuse. lol

On my part, when I give advice, it’s always genuine and comes from a place of honesty and concern. My advice to Leisan comes from truly concern about him, but he’s been lying and even has the nerve to say the complete opposite of what he originally said. It’s frustrating when he twists the truth like that.

It's not really about me, but more about the things Leisan said to Mike, which turned out to be completely different from his version of the story. Initially, I didn’t know who to believe—it was his word against Mike’s. But Mike had documented his side, making it clear that Leisan was lying.

He seems terrified of being penniless again, to the point that he hoards cash—literally thousands of dollars, chained to his wallet, which is attached to his waist. It’s extreme. The way he talks to people can be really offensive sometimes. But I’m trying to see it as a lesson: people become who they are because of their past experiences, and I realize that who I am today is also a reflection of the trauma I’ve experienced in my own life.

Labels: friendship, maldives, trauma

I really admire my cousin for being so patient, selfless, and dedicated to both her mom and brother. But it’s unfair that she’s the only one taking care of them, while her brother doesn’t even offer to help, especially since their mom is still okay after her mild stroke. He’s just so irresponsible and selfish.

She’s been struggling financially ever since. She owes me money, but honestly, I’m not worried about that—I just want her to be debt-free.

Life can be so complicated, and everyone has their own struggles. My cousin is doing her best to survive and find happiness, and I don’t judge her for whatever makes her happy, even if others have opinions about it.

I feel so lucky to have a job that pays well, even though I still dream of finding something better and aiming higher for the future. But I know that God works in mysterious ways to bless me. The rejections I’ve faced in the past turned out to be blessings in disguise.

Sometimes, I feel bad when I get overwhelmed by small things that don’t go my way. But I’ve realized those moments are just reminders to appreciate what I have and the success that God has in store for me. It’s all part of the journey.

Labels: blessing, cousin, debt, story